Move over group chat: there is a new friend in town, and it never leaves you on read. New research from greeting card marketplace thortful reveals that 16.8% of UK adults have turned to artificial intelligence instead of a friend for advice, comfort, or a second opinion. A further 12.8% have gone as far as calling their chatbot a genuine long-term companion.
However, robots are not stealing our mates just yet. The same research shows humans are still very much winning, with 68.3% of Brits saying they have never chosen AI over a person for advice or support. Even among the AI-curious, almost half (46.9%) admit they still prefer their own thinking to whatever the chatbot suggests. It seems we like having a digital sounding board that we can switch on or off at will.
Behaviour specialist Sim Shamu explains that turning to AI instead of the group chat is not necessarily a red flag, as it all comes down to the role it plays: “I don’t think turning to AI before another person is automatically a cause for concern. For me, the important thing is what the tool is doing for you. Used like that, it can act almost like rehearsal, helping someone organise their thoughts, understand a concept and then going back into the real interaction better prepared,” he comments. “Instead, we should be asking whether the tool is helping us participate more effectively in our relationships or gradually replacing parts of those relationships.”
Key findings from the survey
- More than half of UK adults (54.3%) have used AI for personal or professional reasons. Uses range from writing work emails and asking health questions to seeking advice on what to say during an argument, with 5.8% saying they have even outsourced the last word in a row to a chatbot.
- Friends are the relationship most likely to be replaced by AI. They are replaced more often than parents (8.2%), partners (7.2%), or bosses (7.2%). Adults are also more likely to seek a second opinion from AI about their boss than from a lawyer (4.0%) or doctor (5.8%).
- AI companionship shows a gender divide. Men are more likely than women to describe their AI as a genuine long-term companion (16.4% versus 9.7%). Women, meanwhile, are twice as likely to rate AI advice as genuinely good logic (25.3% versus 12.5% of men).
- Edinburgh, Southampton, and Manchester have the highest levels of AI attachment. Around 1 in 5 residents in each city describe their chatbot as a long-term companion.
- AI use varies across age groups. Adults aged 18–24 and those aged 55 and over are the most likely to say they still prefer their own output to that of AI. Adults aged 25–54, who are balancing work, family, and other daily commitments, report greater use of AI.
Is AI stealing our friends?
Not really, but it is clearly auditioning for a supporting role. Researchers worldwide have raised long-term questions about what happens when always-available, endlessly patient AI begins filling gaps once occupied by human relationships. This research suggests that shift is already emerging in the UK, although on a relatively small scale.
The figures suggest people are not handing over their relationships to AI. Instead, they appear to be using it for smaller tasks, such as drafting an awkward text, working out how to phrase something, or seeking support during moments of uncertainty, while continuing to rely on friends for companionship and personal connection. AI may have earned a seat at the table, but it has not been invited to the wedding.
Shamu says it is worth asking what we are actually using AI for before we give it a permanent seat at the table: “The question is what role AI is serving in the moment? Rehearsal, reassurance, information, avoidance, or decision-making, because those uses are likely to have very different consequences. Your survey found both substantial continued preference for people’s own judgement and a smaller group reporting AI as a longer-term companion, so there may be several different patterns sitting underneath the headline figures.”
There is also a behavioural reason people may choose AI over a difficult conversation. If speaking to somebody feels embarrassing, uncertain, or likely to lead to conflict, avoiding the conversation can bring immediate relief. That relief can reinforce avoidance, even when having the conversation might be more beneficial in the longer term. If AI repeatedly becomes an easier alternative to uncomfortable interactions, there is a risk that people get less practice with the interpersonal skills they need to develop.
Shamu adds: “For me, the habit becomes worth examining when it starts affecting quality of life, when somebody feels less able to have a conversation, make a decision, tolerate uncertainty or maintain a relationship without first relying on AI. I don’t think though that we need to be avoiding AI. Instead, we should be asking whether the tool is helping us participate more effectively in our relationships, or gradually replacing parts of those relationships.”
For those who freeze up staring at a blank card, more than 1 in 9 Brits (11.4%) have turned to AI for help finding the right words to write. For anyone struggling beyond a standard greeting, guidance is available through thortful’s card writing guide.